Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in estergrenwod's LiveJournal:

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Sunday, November 15th, 2009
6:14 pm	The Transition Winter apathy and gloom is descending yet again. I can tell by the way I want to be in bed by 6 when it’s dark by 4. I don’t really have the energy or inclination to write a big expositive blog about my emotional issues with winter time, but I would like to say that this year I’m going to try like never before to keep my shit together. There’s no end-all-be-all blanket solution for staying happy and healthy throughout those long cold months: the best bet is to immerse myself in activities and company that uplift and inspire. Never give up. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Sunday, August 16th, 2009
8:25 pm	PRODIGAL SUMMER This title refers to my experiences of the past few months, and not the fantastic book by Barbie-K. As always, the summer has flown by way too fast and I've got school staring me in the face yet again. Luckily, it turns out I'm too broke to take more than one class. Graduation gets further and further away all the time, but at least I won't be all stressed out and putting my personal life on hold for the next few months. It has been one of my best summers for sure, because I've been doing a pretty good job of "sucking the marrow out of life," which, in my current mood and situation translates to "partying" and "having fun." hehe. i don't feel remotely guilty about not "accomplishing" more this summer because i've made several drastic lifestyle improvements that i'm hoping to maintain throughout the winter. i've been hanging out with fantastic people, reading kickass books and watching kickass movies, getting plenty of exercise and sunshine and fresh air, sleeping 10 hours per night when i can, and eating healthy good quality food. so often it's the simple things that make all the difference. so yeah, that's that. maybe i'll have more to say when i finally get a new computer in a few weeks, but it looks like i've kind of gone off blogging for the time being. shit happens. (Comment on this)
Friday, August 14th, 2009
5:07 pm	dan savage is one wise mufuh! i read savage love every week and nearly always agree with what danny-s has to say. this week's article was particularly poignant. you all know about the crazy dude who shot up a fitness center because he wasn't getting any? well... A couple months ago, I sent you an e-mail thanking you for doing what you do. Today, the power of your voice hit home. As you know, an angry, sexually frustrated gunman went on a killing spree at a fitness center in Pittsburgh. Reading the killer's blog, I was struck by the similarity of his situation to that of the lonely, sexually frustrated men you counseled in your column the week before the shooting. But George Sodini did not reach out; the men who wrote you did. The reason this strikes so close to home is that my situation for years was very similar to Sodini's and to the lonely men who you helped in that column. Although I wasn't a virgin, I was "clogged up" and unable to get close to people physically and emotionally. I overcame my fears and hang-ups, and life is good now. But it wasn't easy. I was never as angry as Sodini, but I was absolutely as lonely and isolated as he was and every bit as lonely as the men whose letters you answered. Maybe if I'd been alone another 14 years—I found my life partner at 34—I might have become that angry. Middle-Aged Family Guy Thank you for the note, MAFG, and thanks—I think—for pointing me to George Sodini's blog. The blog has been pulled down, but it is extensively quoted in news reports and it makes for depressing reading. It's never pretty when chronic sexual deprivation and a lifetime of romantic rejection slam into a narcissistic personality with sociopathic tendencies who happens to live in a country awash in guns: "I actually look good. I dress good, am clean-shaven, bathe, touch of cologne—yet 30 million women rejected me, over an 18- or 25-year period. That is how I see it. Thirty million is my rough guesstimate of how many desirable single women there are." So, hey, why not go shoot up an aerobics class full of women? A woman I knew at college—an antiviolence activist, righteous and right-on—used to say, "Testosterone is gasoline, porn the match." I disagree. Testosterone is gasoline—which isn't necessarily a bad thing (gas makes things go)—but sexual frustration is the match. I'm not suggesting that this tragedy could've been averted if only some selfless woman had "taken one for the team" and married Sodini, an asshole and a sociopath. The women who rejected him obviously saw him for what he was and were right to run in the other direction. But if someone had told Sodini, who hadn't had sex since 1990, to see sex workers—something I advised the guys in my column two weeks ago to consider (among other things)—it might have taken the edge off his anger and kept it from curdling into homicidal rage. Maybe if we, as a society, valued sex workers and sex work, if we legalized and regulated it, and if we viewed "paying for it" as a legitimate option for guys who would otherwise go without for decades, perhaps this tragedy could have been averted. Don't get me wrong: I wouldn't wish a client as sick as Sodini on any of my sex-worker pals. But if Sodini had started seeing sex workers back in 1991 and not, say, two weeks ago last Monday, perhaps he wouldn't have snapped. But Sodini wasn't taking advice from me. He was getting it from R. Don Steele, author of How to Date Young Women: For Men Over 35. The book was sitting on Sodini's coffee table in a video he posted to the web. Steele apparently traffics in—and profits from—instilling false hopes in losers like Sodini. ("Immediately improve your success with women!" Steele says on his website www.steelballs.com. "Everything is 100% guaranteed money back.") Sodini felt that he was entitled not just to sex and a romantic relationship, but to sex and a romantic relationship with a much younger woman. And he was following the advice of a love-and-romance guru who encouraged him to cling to that belief. But Sodini wasn't just another socially maladapted schlub furious with the world—and with women—for denying him the twentysomething ass he felt he had coming. Sodini was a nut. And he couldn't understand why, if he was doing everything right, he wasn't finding the success that Steele guaranteed him. Someone needed to sit Sodini down and explain that settling down requires settling for and that young women are usually interested in young men and that we can't always have what we want and that there might be women out there who would date him—perhaps women closer to his own age, women in his own league in the looks and social-skills departments (and Sodini wasn't bad looking)—but no woman was going to date him until after he got his shit together. And someone needed to tell him that he wasn't going to impress the ladies by leaving How to Date Young Women: For Men Over 35 on his coffee table. And someone needed to tell him that some men—and some women—are alone all their lives and, yeah, that sucks and it's not fair and it hurts. Instead, Sodini had R. Don "Steel Balls" Steele telling him that if he just bought a matching sofa set—really—and the right suit, that success was guaranteed. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, July 27th, 2009
10:15 am	done blogging?!? i haven't been online too much lately since i broke my computer. hopefully i'll have a new one in the next month or so. the lack of internet is probably good for me. i'm definitely catching up on my reading and music. right now i'm reading "City of Beasts," by isabel allende and "Blind Assassin" by margaret atwood, along with various batman comics. when i AM online i just have no desire to blog. it used to be a weird compulsion. something would happen and i'd have to blog it i've had online journals of some sort for about 7 years now and this is really the first time i've gone without updating for weeks at a time. well, shit happens. suffice it to say that i'm having a good summer, but there's also a lot of weird shit going down. good and weird. and it's already almost over. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 14th, 2009
10:41 pm	PARDEE COUNTDOWN: 4 DAYS LEFT It’s been a while since I’ve updated the blog. I’ve been terribly busy having a fantastic time nearly every day. So instead of giving a rundown of the last few weeks’ activities, we’ll just skip to the end and discuss this week. I’m having my annual Picnic of Love/Barfday Barbecue on Saturday night and have been going insane with preparation. There will probably be at least 30 people here throughout the course of the evening, which is frankly more friends than I knew I had. Hehe. So that’s cool. It does require different preparations than last year, when maybe 10 or 12 showed up. I made tons of fancy food last year, and this year I’m going to make huge quantities of only a few dishes: brats, veggie burgers, slow cooker vegetarian baked beans, potato salad, marinated veggies, fruit salad, chips and salsa, and cookies. I’m trusting that other people will also bring food and there will be plenty to go around. Also, the neighbors have been notified of possible noise, and invited over so they could be a part of the noise. This kind of thing is less annoying when you’re actively involved. Hehe. I don’t anticipate a huge number of people having to crash here, but my apartment can provide comfortable sleeping space for about 6, and I’ll put the tent up in the back yard. I trashed the Bay View Bar Crawl idea because the combination of booze and cars adds too many risks and complications and I think it’s best to keep shit simple. If we want to go out, Marquette neighborhood will do. It’s within walking distance. So yeah, the wheels are in motion. Here’s the itinerary for the week: -Monday: Mop kitchen and bathroom. Contact everyone who’s invited. -Tuesday: Scrub bathroom. Buy cookie ingredients. -Wednesday: Bring laptop to work and come up with an appropriate music set list during lunch. Make cookies. Go for jog. (I can already feel myself expanding and softening after 3 days of inactivity. Also, I’ve got a lot energy and excitability to burn off.) Ask landlord about fridge situation. -Thursday: Hassle everyone who hasn’t RSVPed yet and get a grand total. See Harry Potter with some buddies, dressed as Hermione Granger. -Friday: Purchase and cut up produce. Do as much prep work as possible. Put baked beans in slow cooker. Finish any last minute cleaning. Get plenty of sleep. -Saturday: Prepare rest of food. Jog again if there’s time. Pick up Katie, Ben, and any other Bay View buddies who want a ride back here at around 5:30. PARTY ALL NIGHT LONG WITH MY FRIENDS!!!!!!!!!! Yeah, it’s going to be a fantastic night. I’m excited to hang out with several people I haven’t seen in a while. I’ll also be hanging out with some work people for the first time outside of work, which is awesome. (Hopefully anyone who’s gonna be hatin’ stays away.) And of course, It’ll be great to chill with my old faithfuls, who are some of the most important people in my life at the moment. Okay, time for some Arrested D and then bed. (Comment on this)
Thursday, June 25th, 2009
7:22 am	30 rock season finale oh my lord this show is fucking hilarious. without giving away any plot points, jack donaghy is trying to get a kidney for a dude, so he uses his substantial wealth and influence to get a huge load of musicians to put on a benefit concert. For this one dude. The episode ends with this group of musicians sing a song called "Give a Kidney:" Elvis Costello, Mary J. Blige, Sheryl Crow, Clay Aiken, Adam Levine, Adrock and Mike D of The Beastie Boys, Michael McDonald, Rhett Miller, Wyclef Jean, Steve Earle, Moby, Cyndi Lauper, Sara Bareilles, Robert Randolph, Rachel Yamagata, Talib Kweli and Norah Jones. there were no available youtube videos, but here are the lyrics: "Sometimes life brings pain and strife and all seems wrong That is when you find a friend and write a song So give the gift of giving, give it far and give it wide Take a leap, reach down deep inside And just give a kidney to a father or a dad Just give a kidney, we hear it doesn’t really hurt that bad And we know you want to give it to a super human being So just get it done, we just need one for Milton Green This country has 600 million kidneys and we really only need half That leaves about 300 million kidneys to the lab Milton Green, Milton Green, Milton Green, Milton Green, Milton Green (He needs a kidney) Milton Green’s a swell guy, he could die if you don’t call today Listen, when someone starts talking in the middle of a song, you know it’s serious Give Milton a kidney. We all believe in this cause so much that we’re doing it for free. Except Sheryl. That’s right, I’m the only one getting paid. And only three of us are drunk Milton Green needs a kidney just like I need this beard. You don’t want to know what’s under here. And while you don’t have two beards, you DO have two kidneys. Think of it this way: if I had two dollars I’d give you one, wouldn’t I? I’m one of the drunk ones! They say that two is better than one but sometimes one is better than two! If you had two heads you’d wish you had one! How is this different? If you had two dogs attacking you you’d want just one! How is this different? There, we proved the point! MILTON GREEN, MILTON GREEN, MILTON GREEN, MILTON GREEN, MILTON GREEN (He needs a kidney) Milton Green’s a swell guy, he could die if you don’t call today He needs a kidney, no he doesn’t need a hand He just needs a kidney. A hand would be an even harder thing to give If you give a kidney, and we really think you should We passed the cup, let’s stitch it up, and do some good. Liz Lemon: We sure have had quite a year. Jack Donaghy: What are you talking about? It’s May. Liz Lemon: Shhhhhh." so fucking hilarious. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, June 24th, 2009
9:35 pm	HEIDI’S 26TH BARFDAY! My computer’s being super lame with a really bad keyboard lag, so we’ll keep this short. The main point is that my birthday festivities were a delightful romp. I got fucking plastered and had many fantastic adventures. Actually I seem to be boozing it up a lot nowadays. Which is A-okay because it’s summer and I’m staying on top of my shit just fine. No going to work hung-over for me! Also, -I passed my emissions test this morning. I drove to Waukesha and back and I guess that prepared my engine sufficiently. That’s a bit load off my mind. -I dropped my summer class for financial reasons. I got a meaty bill in the mail for my cavity filling last month, even though I have dental insurance. Also got a big old student loan bill. The class was expensive but I would have broken even. Now I’ll be in the red and am not in the mood to scrimp and pinch to make ends meet for the rest of the summer. Fuck that. -I’m going to Summerfest tomorrow. If you’re interested in meeting up, let me know! -I saw my second deer in Milwaukee in about two weeks. They seem to love hanging out at the Menomonee River. That’s enough for now. More birthday festivities are to come. I like the idea of celebrating ones birthday for at least a month or so. Really it’s just an excuse to get together with your buddies and have fun. Yay birthdays! (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, June 21st, 2009
5:23 pm	THIS PARTY'S GETTIN' RAW LIKE SUSHI, SO HATERS TO THE LEFT! christ. i just got back from a walk at Washington Park, where there were about a million picnics and family reunions and that kind of thing. i encountered an adorable little black boy on a trike. he flashed me a toothy grin, which i returned. his mom or grandma or something SCREECHED at him (and i quote:), "DENZEL, YOU GET AWAY FROM THAT WHITE WOMAN THIS INSTANT BEFORE I WHOOP YOUR ASS!" WHITE WOMAN?!? there were probably 50 people within a quarter mile of me. what the fuck did she think i was going to do? that is one of the more hateful jabs made at my be a complete stranger, i have to say. i gave her a damn dirty look, but kept walking. meh. this has been a frustrating weekend. i had so much crap to get done, and though i was working the entire time i feel like i barely made a dent. >sigh< well, shit happens. here are a few points of interest: -i saw a deer in milwaukee! it was prancing through "honey creek parkway," which is kind of near 'tosa outpost. i was biking at about the same pace a short distance away, and we traveled that stretch together. that was awesome. i felt for a second like i wasn't so terribly far from the untamed beauty of the north. -i am going to make a committment right here and now to start taking all my meals at the kitchen table like a civilized person. i've been eating way too much in front of the tv, which is just generally not good for various reasons. not least of which is that my tv is in the bedroom nowadays and i'm pretty sure that treating your bed as a table is a disaster waiting to happen. -i am unexpectedly disappointed with janelle monae's new album, "metropolis suite II & III." i was hoping it would keep in the tradition of "many moons" and "sincerely, jane," but it's way more R&B and ballad-y. ah well. lots of times i'll dislike an album on first listen that i grow to love with time. we'll see. -i am equally unexpectly impressed with conor oberst's new album, called "conor oberst." there was a big article in rolling stone about him going to asia and talking to shaman and being "born again" and probably taking lethal doses of acid so i figured it would probably be a pretentious piece of crap. but actually the tunes are chill and folky and similar to those of "i'm wide awake it's morning." they're.. uplifting. heh. so kudos to him. now i'm kind of intersted in seeing him at summerfest. he's playing on thursday night and i DO have friday off work.. i don't suppose anyone would be down for coming with, eh? (Comment on this)
Thursday, June 18th, 2009
8:48 pm	a fantastic meal awwwww shit. today was one of the longer work days i've experienced in a while because i simply could not wake up. i got a good 6 hours of sleep last night but i think it was all fitful. i woke up in the middle of this strange dream where i was hanging out with elvis costello and then he randomly became jeff goldbloom, which i found disappointing. i woke up feeling like i hadn't slept at all. the thing about work is that no matter how endless a particular day feels, it will eventually be over and done and in the past. i took a bus home, so convinced was i with my fatigue that i felt i couldn't even manage a two-mile walk. then i picked up my car and ran right to outpost for a substantial meal and fancy beer for a work buddy. here's what's for dinner: -grilled chicken breast sandwich with artichoke spread, goat cheese, spinach, and tomato -peach-ginger smoothie -black cherry belgian kriek beer -1.25 oz lake champlain organic chocolate bar with milk sea salt and almonds DAMN i feel good now. not the healthiest meal in the world, but it could have been worse. (of course, it could ALWAYS be worse so that reasoning is pretty useless.) i've been doing this thing lately where on a regular basis i'll eat ridiculously simple food like rice and beans or a salad. but then every once in a while i'll splurge on a fancy restaurant or too much booze or take-out. i feel like this system's really working out for my mercurial nature. my exercise habits have been a similarly unholy combination of epic 2-hour bike rides one day followed by nothing but slothing around the house on the next. i seem to have really hit a stride with my lifestyle here. excess and restraint in satisfying proportions. now i'm slothing around on my bed in front of a star trek episode and will probably be asleep within the hour. this is probably the awesomest end to a long day that i could ever hope for. just a few more things: -my class starts on monday. it'll be pretty intensive, but only four weeks long with straightforward familiar content. something about conservation and environmentalism. -i'm inspired to take a legitimate yoga class and have been researching up on it a bit. one studio is only 2 miles from my house so i might go with that. we'll see. -i am obsessed with massive attack's "blue lines" right now. i might like it even more than mezzanine. i've also been into discovering new music as of late ("my brightest diamond," "cold war kids"), revisiting old favorites ("ladytron," "chromeo"), and checking out what new music old bands have come up with ("rilo kiley," conor oberst's pretentious new band called.. no joke: "mystic valley band"). if you want to contribute to my listening pleasure, shout me a holla dawg. mmk, sorry bout a basically pointless blog. i got some time on my hands, see. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, June 17th, 2009
10:00 pm	ATTENTION! BIRTHDAY PARTY PLANS! BIKE LOVE! So, tentatively I’m thinking about having my birthday barbeque/picnic on Saturday, July 18. I’d prob want to start at around 6 or 7, head to the park for food and booze, and then eventually move it back to my place for more food and more booze. What do you guys think? Are you free that night? (David, Ashley, Andrea, and Kristen, I’m especially asking you.) I would like to accommodate as many peoples’ schedules as possible so let me know ASAP. Everyone’s invited, but PERSONALLY I think that anyone who’s planning to talk shit about my guests in a mean-spirited way can go ahead and make other plans for that night. I’m not interested in any of that noise. That said, let’s make my 26th birthday an event to remember. Food, friends, booze, and togetherness are the perfect formula for a spankin’ fine time! EDIT: On second thought, let’s keep the party at my place to minimize the complications of transporting all that shit. I’ve got a picnic table, grill, and ample backyard space, so it’s all cool. ******************************************************************************** i biked for about an hour today along the menomonee river, and my first thought after i'd been fed and watered and showered was, "oh shit! i should have exercised or something today." hehe. of course a bike ride is more than your daily dose of superb cardio awesomeness, but it cleverly disguises itself as fun and rejuvenating leisure-time, causing me to second-guess my post-work time management. DAMN i love my bike. i have to say i love it even more nowadays since i'm not completely dependent on it as a form of transportation. anyway, that's it for now. fun times are headed your way. beware! (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, June 13th, 2009
6:31 pm	cold cruel light of morning it is 6:21 pm and i am just now transformed back to a whole and healthy human being who doesn't have her head buried in the toilet. i went out with work people last night and it was a damn good time, but those two shots after all the beer was NOT a great idea. "beer before liquor, never been sicker," right? i have not been this hungover for years and years and years, and somehow i just didn't see it coming. heh. well, perhaps i learn my lesson now. no more shots. that was probably the most miserable hangover of my life. ughh. in other news, some of you might be interested to know that jackson publick updated his blog: http://jacksonpublick.livejournal.com/ okay, i've got to take a shower and get some shit done, since i won't be home tomorrow to do anything. fucking weekends go by too fucking quickly nowadays. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, June 10th, 2009
11:04 pm	The Queen's Rebuke I still have The Decemberists on my mind. I’m definitely developing a bit of a girl-crush on Shara Warden, who did guest vocals for the new album. I’d say I’m about 85% heterosexual, but from time to time I become a bit enamored of various female movie or music personalities. I wanted to find a good video of the ladies singing Heart’s “Crazy on You” but the sound and video is all shitty. This is a pretty good vid of “The Queen’s Rebuke,” which was actually one of the best parts of the show in my opinion. Enjoy! Anyway, it’s been a while since I’ve updated bloggy-blog. Obviously, I’m back from my camping trip. It was one of the best vacations of my life, and has changed the course of my future simply by rendering it necessary to take more camping trips later on, and often. I tried to savor every second of it, and I think we did a pretty good job of experiencing every new activity that made itself available to us, talking to everyone we could about their particular locations, and generally taking on adventures as they presented themselves instead of sticking to a rigid schedule. I’ve got no delusions about the “roughness” of camping. SOMEONE I talked to about the trip seemed to think that the reason I had such a good time was that everything went completely as planned and nothing too unexpectedly terrible happened and really, we had it easy. That attitude was fucking weak and pissed me off, I gotta say. We slept seven nights on the ground. We dealt with ticks trying to shoot their living organisms into our blood streams. We stayed in five different locations around the state in these seven nights, and had to pack and unpack everything including the tend every time. We drove for hours and hours after a negligible amount of sleep and couldn’t relax upon arrival until we set up the tent, started a fire, and cooked our dinners. We dealt with a bit of rain and several nights that got down to the low 30’s. We got through each challenge that presented itself (and there were plenty) by keeping a positive attitude and using every bit of wit and resourcefulness we could muster. GodDAMN, I am getting sick of some peoples’ attitudes. Anyway, that is probably not an appropriate rant for this venue, and it’s really neither here nor there. The trip was fan-fucking-tastic and definitely inspired a good deal of “school spirit” for my state. Wisconsin is fucking gorgeous. Things have been a little iffy upon my arrival home. A lot of weird random mostly small problems are presenting themselves. One of the newer annoyances is that the seminar class I was signed up to take in the fall has been cancelled. UWM really has a way of Fing you in the A when it wants to. I’ve got to email my advisor to see what the hell I’m supposed to do now, and whether it’s even remotely possible for me to graduate within the next ten years. Grrr. One pretty cool thing is that I took a two-hour bike ride today. Purely by accident: the trail I like to use to get through Wauwatosa is randomly closed down and I got damn lost trying to manage the detours because I’m not very familiar with those areas. It was a grand adventure, and I probably rode a good 25 to 30 miles. Which is impressive since I’m not in any kind of great biking shape. Well anyway, that’s all I’ve got for now. I’ve been fucking fatigued as fuck lately, probably because of the practically unprecedented amount of exercise I’ve been getting as of late. Time to lie in my bed and catch some 30 Rock: something new and different for me. Teehee. (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, May 30th, 2009
8:45 am	"Look for me with the sun-bright sparrow; I will come on the breath of a wind" okay, ONE more blog. i think it's important to quickly take note of how fucking awesome the show was before we leave in a few hours. i can't remember if this is the fourth or fifth decemberists concert i've seen but i can say that they have put on consistantly amazing show every single time. "the hazards of love" is a concept album with a tragic fairy tale story about a boy who's a fawn by day falling in love with a damsel in distress which pisses off his haughty queen-of-the-forest mother and excites the interest of the evil rake. actually you can read all about it here: http://firsttube.com/read/the-decemberists-the-hazards-of-love/ they played "hazards of love" all the way through. both women who did the guest vocals on the album were there and dressed appropriately in long flowing princess gowns and short leathery numbers. after that album was spent they took a break and then came back and sang many old favorites, like "sixteen military wives," "we both go down together," "red right ankle," "leslie anne levine," "yankee bayonet," and "engine driver." THEN to give the guest singers a moment in the spotlight they covered "crazy on you" by heart. DAMN good. of course the good-natured colin meloy chatted amicably with the crowd the entire time and got them singing very loudly by making the balcony compete with the ground floor and that kind of thing. dude knows how to rev his audience up. he got everyone in front up onto the stage during the last song so we could see a huge crowd of people singing and dancing up there at the end alone with the band. they did that at last show too, and the audience loves it. it's always nice when you can see that band members obviously cool, nice people in real life and not arrogent dicks. good times were had. everyone who came in my posse seemed to love it. i will continue to go see this band as long as they feel like playing in my city. or in madison, because that works too. okay, last minute packing must be done. we're getting the rental car in 1 1/2 hours. see y'all on the other side. pray that the bears and wood ticks leave us alone. ciao! (Comment on this)
Saturday, May 23rd, 2009
11:10 pm	brief update i'll keep it brief because i'm buzzing and sleepy. here's what you need to know: -this time next week i'll be on vacation up north. i don't know if i'll update again before that. you can bet i'm damn excited. this week will probably be hectic with last minute preparations. i fucking hope the work week won't drag out forever. -my computer is still not available for use. i'd figured i would just have to get a new one but my buddy dan had a look and said it only needs a new hard drive. and then he said he'd randomly fix or update a million other minor issues. that dan will be getting some extremely fancy beer as a thank you, let me tell you. -i have acquired a car. my neighbor's kind of giving it to me. the papers have been signed and the keys are in my possession. i took a half day off work this wednesday so i could go to the dmv for a license plate. i want to find some cheap car insurance this weekend and i'll be all set. any other time i'd be freaking out about how exciting this is, but right now the camping trip is what's in the front of my brain so i'm just trying to get all the car shit squared away so i can use it when i get back. -when i get back from camping i'm going to focus on my birthday party. i can't think that far ahead right now. so yeah.. shit is happening! i can't express in words how excited i am for this trip, so you'll have to take my word for it. during the day we'll be hiking, biking, yoga-ing, canoeing, and swimming, and during the night we'll be drinking and lauging raucously. i can't really think of a better way to spend my time. fuckin a. (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, May 17th, 2009
10:08 am	good morning cyboys and cybergirls! just a quick note to let you know that my computer died because i left a cup of water nearby and one of my kitties dumped it onto the keyboard. i'm not too broken up about this because it's been acting like a piece of crap for ages and i've been kind of waiting for an excuse to get a new one. nevertheless, a work buddy is going to take a look at it on wednesday to see if it's at all salvageable. i'm guessing i won't have a working machine available until after i'm back from my camping trip on june 8. we'll see. the point is that i'll be offline for a while. perhaps quite a while. i'll sign into my various accounts every now and then from "off-campus" computers but if you want to get in touch it's best to use the phone. so that's that. on a side note, it's actually kind of surprising how NOT-upset i am to be without a computer. aside from the inconvenience of not being able to google or wiki random information on a whim, this really doesn't bother me at all. perhaps an internet hiatus has been long in coming. last night was.. something. i've still got a bad taste in my mouth from twilight. everyone seemed to agree that even rifftrax couldn't make that movie watchable. nevertheless, good times were had with people i don't hang out with on a regular basis. so that's cool. it's always great to hear work people being really fucking leud. i used to think i was a weirdo, but nowadays i'm convinced that pretty much everyone is a huge fuckin perve. so that's cool. next weekend my mom is coming. and the weekend after that is decemberists and then camping! i just reserved a rental car and so all there is left to do is make duplicates of my house keys so my kind and wonderful neighbor can feed my kitties. aside from still needing to purchase a few odds and ends (in addition to all the food and booze we're bringing) i feel like we're pretty much all set. maybe i'll start packing later on. i fear that these next two weeks at work will drag like a muther, but that can't be helped so i won't worry about it. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, May 13th, 2009
8:36 pm	"A Dream Within A Dream" Take this kiss upon the brow! And, in parting from you now, Thus much let me avow- You are not wrong, who deem That my days have been a dream; Yet if hope has flown away In a night, or in a day, In a vision, or in none, Is it therefore the less gone? All that we see or seem Is but a dream within a dream. I stand amid the roar Of a surf-tormented shore, And I hold within my hand Grains of the golden sand- How few! yet how they creep Through my fingers to the deep, While I weep- while I weep! O God! can I not grasp Them with a tighter clasp? O God! can I not save One from the pitiless wave? Is all that we see or seem But a dream within a dream? -Edgar Allen Poe (Comment on this)
Sunday, May 10th, 2009
7:44 pm	Stellar Weekend in Pictures What a fantastic weekend. After an unusually long and lame day at work on Saturday, I got together with Jazmine and Katie for dinner. We went to an Italian place. Can’t remember the name. I enjoyed going out with these girls to a semi-fancy restaurant. We felt like yuppies in our ‘30s. I can always count on feeling a little older and classier than usual when hanging out with Jazzie-poo. It was a delightful time out with the girls. We indulged in fancy drinks and were cheerfully buzzing throughout the entire meal: We got some cheese bread as an appetizer and were unable to take pics until we’d nearly finished it off: Jazmine got ravioli: Katie got fettuccine with chicken I think: I got salmon with wine sauce, spaghetti, artichoke, and broccoli. It was divine: After the meal we went back to Katie’s for a while and then Jazmine and I met up with Buddy B and Carrie for the Mogwai show. It was fantastic. Download and listen to “Happy Songs for Happy People.” As always, it was wonderful to see B and Carrie. They are one of the happiest, cutest, and awesomest couples in the world. Carrie’s got a baby in her stomach. I put my hand on it and felt it kick. Here is a poor quality pic: After the show we all went our separate ways. I was going to head back to Katie and Ben’s but they had gone out to a Bay View bar with Nick and Erin, so I met them there. We drank and made merry late into the night, then went back to Katie and Ben’s for some MST3K but ended up passing out in the first 5 minutes. I had no less than 6 drinks for all varieties last night. That would have been a lethal amount for me if not spread out over 7 hours and laced with plenty of Italian carbs. Katie and I woke up late today and were going to hit up a free yoga class in Riverwest. But when we got to the bus stop it was discovered that Katie’s pass was missing and we had no cash. We were damn disappointed but quickly got over it I suggested we head to the lake and practice yoga out there. First we messed around on the rocks for a while. I like this picture of Katie because it is not posed. I captured this moment of Katie glorying in nature of her own accord: This picture of me is posed. I was trying to look like The Thinker but I think the effect might be lost with all my clothes and femaleness: Finally we buckled down and had fantastic workout. There is nothing as wonderful as yoga outside. It was a magical experience. But it was fucking cold. Our feet were freezing: So yeah, all around fantastic weekend. I can’t deny that I’m having more Sunday night anxiety than normal now though. Ah well. Next weekend will be awesome also. We’re going to watch Twilight with rifftrax. One more thing: I can officially do AT LEAST one man-style pushup. This is quite a fuckin breakthrough for me. WHOOOOOO!!! EDIT: My Mom finally called and is freaking out about her Mother's Day flowers. She pronounced them "shockingly beautiful." She's going to take a picture so we can see them. (Comment on this)
Friday, May 8th, 2009
8:59 pm	live long and prosper. and watch star trek. this movie will BLOW YOUR MIND. seriously, this was an OUTSTANDING. i'm not going to bother talking about it here until y'all have seen it. you must do so as soon as possible! i'm currently downloading the first season of the original series. it's begun. i'm finally crossing over to the side of ultimate geekiness. i always knew this would happen someday. i just didn't expect it to be so soon. (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, May 7th, 2009
9:11 pm	calloo! callay! oh man, tonight is a fantastic night. here's what went down: -i got home at about 6. it was raining, but i didn't mind. warm rain doesn't bother me in the least. -quick dinner while watching a black adder episode. -had my first beer while weightlifting and watching old 30 rock episodes. was able to do a fear-free shoulder stand. developed a general sense of euphoria from combined efforts of exercise-induced endorphins and beer. -cleaned dishes and cat box to the spectacular cd a work buddy made me. full orchestral versions of radiohead's ok computer and kid A. very pleasant indeed. -went outside to enjoy my second beer in the night air. watched the clouds drift across the moon. thought about the genuine silence i'll be able to enjoy in northern wisconsin in a mere three weeks. appreciated that i was able to sit outside after dark without freezing my arse off. experienced even more euphoria and well-being. -am planning to jump in the shower next (to save time tomorrow, which will be super busy) and then enjoy my third and final beer while watching more 30 rock until i fall asleep or pass out. so yeah, not too much happening other than some serious relaxation. you can't to that all the time but this is the perfect night for it. AAAHHHHHHHHH. excellent. before i hop in the shower i need to come up with a tentative to do list for tomorrow. i will rank these tasks in their levels of importance, 1 being most important and 3 being least. -go to dmv to get a new license with my current addy so i'll be able rent a car. (1) -grocery shop (2) -head to value village to pick up tank tops (3) -get house keys duplicated (2) -go to east library to shout dagon a holla (2) -enjoy a magnificent bike ride (1) -laundry (2) -read katie's blog (1) -study biology (1) -look into car rentals (2) -buy moody blues tickets (1) -make bread (1) -make tuna casserole OR veggie stew (2) -figure out weekend plans with jazmine and katie (1) -schedule annual check-up with doctor for sometime in august (3) okay, that's all i can think of now. i'm sure i'm missing shit because i've got a spectacular buzz going, but it'll come back to me tomorrow. if i can get all the "1's" done i'll be super stoked. now it's time for a shower, more beer, and 30 rock. WHOOOOOOOO! (Comment on this)
Tuesday, May 5th, 2009
8:00 pm	FIGHT THE FEARS THAT BE! nice. i just finished my weightlifting routine for today. this is the first time i incorporated the shoulder stand and the upward bow pose, both of which can be seen here: practicing that outside in the sunshine on sunday with katie was fun, but doing these moves inside by myself is somehow scarier. especially the shoulder stand. being upside-down is disorienting, no doubt about that. it's in no way dangerous so i can logically tell myself that any fear i might have is irrational and can and should be dismantled. and then suck it up, do the shoulder stand against my wall, find that its really no big deal, and feel refreshed and invigorated and ready to tackle other irrational fears and anxieties! it's a body exercise for sure but i think its really more of a mind exercise. so yeah, things are going well. spirits are high. i've been in a good mood since about late february for several different reasons. one is that we're going camping in 3 1/2 weeks! i really can't even communicate how excited i am for this. i know it'll be exactly what i need. what i've needed for a long time now. also, i feel like i'm practicially brimming over with healthiness. i've been walking every day, biking most weekends, weightlifting, and working out on the exercise bike. that thing is the shit. i'm kind of addicted. i love going on it in the evenings while watching a tv show or reading a book. it's the perfect lazy-person exercise. and.. yeah. i really don't have anything else to say here. just wanted to shout a holla and publicly say that life is good, the world is beautiful, and i love you all. and oh yeah. don't forget to do something nice for your mommies on sunday! (1 Comment |Comment on this)